Today, i have decided to keep a blog or as some say ‘online journal’, I specifically chose to do this as i wanted to get my emotions and feelings out of my head and onto somewhere, where I can trust people.
I love taking photos and videos, and to most I look like the most happiest person in the world. I have loving parents, a beautiful home, lots of food, etc. But just recently things have changed, and I have noticed these things and I’m sure my parents have too. But the thing is that I feel as if i can’t trust anyone to tell these things too, I feel as if all the people around me only want it to be about themselves. I put my happy face on and continue to be the funny, friendly, happy girl that everyone loves.
No one knows the real me, how i really feel – because no one ever asks me, and when they do, they make it about them saying things like “oh yes I’ve been through that” and “it was so awful but i got over it”. It makes me feel smaller and smaller every time. I have days where it goes away and I do feel great and happy. Other days it’s like it will never go and that it will always get worse.
If you haven’t noticed already I have Anxiety and depression.
Some might know anxiety to do a form of being scared – like a dark cloud always above you. I’ve only recently gone through and noticed I’ve had this emotional pain. I’m sharing this with you as I need help, and I want to share my feelings with you all. I won’t get into finer details but i promise i will try and constantly post on here and share my journey with you all. Including some photos, videos, funny moments, travels, beauty, etc.